It is probably inappropriate for me to send what I'm about to say into the blogosphere because it is something so personal, so intimate that no one but the intended recipient should hear it. Unfortunately, because of the nature of our relationship, and because time separates even people who intend to keep in touch, this is the only way I know how to reach out to you.

Listen. I can't say anything to make what you're going through easier. I can't pretend that I understand even a little bit. There is nothing I can say that will be of any comfort or help. In this way I am completely impotent. All I can do is say that you got dealt a shitty hand. What you're going through is inconceivable - a fucking nightmare. It goes against any thinking that the world is in any way good or beautiful or natural, against the things that I taught you were truths, the things that are lovely.

I'm sorry. So sorry.

And I'm here if you need to reach out.