Sunday, May 31, 2009

A Week of Cheers! and Jeers.

Cheer!: The convertible bra - that claims to be strapless, backless, and push up, depending on the occasion - is truly convertible! Standing in front of the Victoria's Secret mirror that instructed me to "strip" in neon red, I realized that in this bra my bosoms went from less than perky bobbers to "you can start me up," va-va-va-voom fantastic! Welcome back to the surface ladies! (and welcome back sideways glances from men)! And watch out Betty Paige! Strip, indeed!

(p.s.. Dear VC, I love the new fitting/customer service system! You guys rock!)

Jeer.: Unfortunately, the convertible part of the bra also converts my stomach into two ginormous muffin tops. Great top to muffin top in a single glance to my midsection. It's fair to say that I do have some body fat to speak of. I did have a baby and all. But seriously, Kate Moss is as waifish as one can get; she's almost inside-out, she's so (too) skinny! And I would wager most of my life's savings on a bet that even Kate Moss would have a muffin top in this thing. Ok, probably not. But it helps me sleep at night to think that. Plus, my life's savings is like three dollars, or something.

Cheer!: Regarding School - Next week is the last week of school! Everyone is so excited, including the teachers who have stopped counting days and started counting minutes! There are very few of us rocking in corners, muttering incoherently to ourselves. I have everything ready for exams and check out, so I really can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Also, I got fifth place in the ranks of teachers voted to read names at graduation. Only the first four read! (This is a victory, friends. Believe me. If you don't understand, try saying "Onegbule" or "Fuc Duc Dong" or "Oluwakanyinsola Obayan" correctly in front of a packed auditorium, these kids' mommas being among the many. Hell, try saying "magna cum laude" correctly. It sucks. But I don't have to do it!!)

The litmag is OUT! It looks phenomenal, thanks to my great staff! (Pictures to follow.) Temporary Utopia , the release party, is over. :)

Jeer.: I still have to make a failure list for those who won't make it. I get so angry when kids put me in this position - having to tell them that I'm sorry that their great aunt Gladys flew in all the way from Buffalo for the commencement, but she'll have to go home. "You're not walking across the stage this time, but chin up! There's always summer graduation." (sigh) I should mention that I do everything I can to help my kids pass. EVERYTHING. Ironically, they have to really work at failing. :(

We have to sell 100 magazines in a week. That's what happens when your deadlines get pushed back two weeks because of AP/IB testing that you forgot was happening the week before the mag was supposed to go to printer.

Hey, y'all! Want to buy a literary magazine for the low, low cost of $15?

Cheer!: My baby is turning one in two weeks!

Jeer.: My baby is turning one in two weeks.

6 comments:

♥ Laura ♥ said...

Ginger, I love love love this post!! Especially the bra story. I'm sure you're not a muffin. You're gorgeous. I'm going to have to look into that bra!! Christine has helped me makeover my lingerie drawer, so I'm sooooo open to the new possibilities.

And maybe it is a blessing you don't have to read those crazy names at graduation. That sounds stressful!!

Jen said...

Haha!! You are too funny! Great post! Enjoy your last week!! I am SO ready for Summer!! Only five more days!! How many minutes is that?

Love ya!

Jen

Yaya said...

I totally need a va-va-voom bra....

msprimadonna67 said...

I know exactly what you mean about being mad at the kids who put you in the position of having to tell them they won't be graduating. I have two this year. One gave up a long time ago, but one, despite many notifications and heart-to-hearts about his status, still is hoping that some eleventh-hour miracle is afoot. Of course, he would like that miracle to be anything BUT him actually completing his work. I'm with you--I do everything I can to help these kids. But when I'm working harder than the kid is to make sure he's graduating, something's just not right.

Deidra said...

HOW IS YOUR BABY GOING TO BE ONE? CRAZY. Glad school is over for yall. Enjoy your summer.

Amy said...

Great post. I love VC at times. After having a child your body is never the same. Really Jack will be one? Wow.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

A Week of Cheers! and Jeers.

Cheer!: The convertible bra - that claims to be strapless, backless, and push up, depending on the occasion - is truly convertible! Standing in front of the Victoria's Secret mirror that instructed me to "strip" in neon red, I realized that in this bra my bosoms went from less than perky bobbers to "you can start me up," va-va-va-voom fantastic! Welcome back to the surface ladies! (and welcome back sideways glances from men)! And watch out Betty Paige! Strip, indeed!

(p.s.. Dear VC, I love the new fitting/customer service system! You guys rock!)

Jeer.: Unfortunately, the convertible part of the bra also converts my stomach into two ginormous muffin tops. Great top to muffin top in a single glance to my midsection. It's fair to say that I do have some body fat to speak of. I did have a baby and all. But seriously, Kate Moss is as waifish as one can get; she's almost inside-out, she's so (too) skinny! And I would wager most of my life's savings on a bet that even Kate Moss would have a muffin top in this thing. Ok, probably not. But it helps me sleep at night to think that. Plus, my life's savings is like three dollars, or something.

Cheer!: Regarding School - Next week is the last week of school! Everyone is so excited, including the teachers who have stopped counting days and started counting minutes! There are very few of us rocking in corners, muttering incoherently to ourselves. I have everything ready for exams and check out, so I really can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Also, I got fifth place in the ranks of teachers voted to read names at graduation. Only the first four read! (This is a victory, friends. Believe me. If you don't understand, try saying "Onegbule" or "Fuc Duc Dong" or "Oluwakanyinsola Obayan" correctly in front of a packed auditorium, these kids' mommas being among the many. Hell, try saying "magna cum laude" correctly. It sucks. But I don't have to do it!!)

The litmag is OUT! It looks phenomenal, thanks to my great staff! (Pictures to follow.) Temporary Utopia , the release party, is over. :)

Jeer.: I still have to make a failure list for those who won't make it. I get so angry when kids put me in this position - having to tell them that I'm sorry that their great aunt Gladys flew in all the way from Buffalo for the commencement, but she'll have to go home. "You're not walking across the stage this time, but chin up! There's always summer graduation." (sigh) I should mention that I do everything I can to help my kids pass. EVERYTHING. Ironically, they have to really work at failing. :(

We have to sell 100 magazines in a week. That's what happens when your deadlines get pushed back two weeks because of AP/IB testing that you forgot was happening the week before the mag was supposed to go to printer.

Hey, y'all! Want to buy a literary magazine for the low, low cost of $15?

Cheer!: My baby is turning one in two weeks!

Jeer.: My baby is turning one in two weeks.

6 comments:

♥ Laura ♥ said...

Ginger, I love love love this post!! Especially the bra story. I'm sure you're not a muffin. You're gorgeous. I'm going to have to look into that bra!! Christine has helped me makeover my lingerie drawer, so I'm sooooo open to the new possibilities.

And maybe it is a blessing you don't have to read those crazy names at graduation. That sounds stressful!!

Jen said...

Haha!! You are too funny! Great post! Enjoy your last week!! I am SO ready for Summer!! Only five more days!! How many minutes is that?

Love ya!

Jen

Yaya said...

I totally need a va-va-voom bra....

msprimadonna67 said...

I know exactly what you mean about being mad at the kids who put you in the position of having to tell them they won't be graduating. I have two this year. One gave up a long time ago, but one, despite many notifications and heart-to-hearts about his status, still is hoping that some eleventh-hour miracle is afoot. Of course, he would like that miracle to be anything BUT him actually completing his work. I'm with you--I do everything I can to help these kids. But when I'm working harder than the kid is to make sure he's graduating, something's just not right.

Deidra said...

HOW IS YOUR BABY GOING TO BE ONE? CRAZY. Glad school is over for yall. Enjoy your summer.

Amy said...

Great post. I love VC at times. After having a child your body is never the same. Really Jack will be one? Wow.