Friday, July 9, 2010

Anniversaries

My mother-in law, Donna, is really good at them.

Evidence:
Donna keeps a calendar in her kitchen that lists every one's birthday, anniversary, doctor's appointment, and other events/occasions. This is not a small feat. Donna has four grown children, three of whom are married, and five grandchildren from those unions. On top of that since we are a "blended family", she also considers her husband's children and his grandchildren as part of her brood. So that's additionally two grown children, both married, and three more grand kids. If I'm doing my math right - and believe me, I need help - that makes 19 birthdays to remember (20 including my father-in-law's), six wedding anniversaries (including her own) to celebrate, and other events/occasions - the extended family's birthdays and anniversaries for example.

The crazy thing is, she never misses anything. For every occasion we can count on receiving a card and a phone call. That means that she plans/schedules "sending" dates to make sure everyone is honored on the appropriate days! That takes organization and coordination - both talents that I lack. She's a star!

In contrast, I am horrible at them.

Evidence:
I still have not delivered/completed all of my Christmas presents from December. I can barely remember my own wedding anniversary much less someone else's. I have never in my life sent anyone else an anniversary card. If you get a birthday card from me, it is usually late. This year (and I'm ashamed to admit it), I gave my husband an "interactive" Father's Day card. That means I bought it at the last minute and wrote in it as we were on a date. He had gone to get drinks and returned before I had finished composing the message.. Thus, we both wrote in the card. Interactive. In hindsight it was kind of a cool idea but totally and shamefully impromptu.

The good news is Rich (my husband) is as forgetful about important dates as I am. In fact, this year on our wedding anniversary he jokes that "we'll celebrate by being in two different towns." He has to be away for work. It hadn't occurred to me that on our anniversary he'll be away. I hadn't even remembered that our anniversary is in the summer. (sigh)

But it's ok. Specific dates elude us, but everyday feels important to us. Essentially, everyday we celebrate each other. How could an anniversary of any kind or a birthday or holiday be more important than all of the other days we get to be together?

That's what I'm telling myself, at least, until I remember to buy a damn kitchen calendar.

This post was inspired by the Loose Bloggers Consortium, a small and feisty(!) global community. We write weekly on a common topic (Anniversaries, this week) and post responses - all of us together, simultaneously, from all over the world. (Lovely!) Please visit Anu, Ashok, Conrad, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Judy, Magpie 11, Maria and Ramana for other wonderful posts.

4 comments:

Grannymar said...

You have a calendar in your cell phone - that is where I keep my special dates.

Rummuser said...

Welcome to the club Ginger. You have been honest. I too can't remember, nor could Urmeela, except a very few important ones. So, my post explains our attitude to anniversaries.

gaelikaa said...

That's me too. But I'm determined to try to remember in future. My three siblings (who are not on Facebook, btw) forgot to wish me this year and I really felt it. In contrast, all my relatives and friends who wished me knew from FB. In fact, because my husband is so forgetful about these matters, the only birthday celebration I had this year was on FB. And Ramana's blog, as he's my adopted brother and dedicated a blog post to me. If it wasn't for my cyber life, and of course my kids, there wouldn't have been a birthday at all!

Maria said...

I have a friend who is so organized that she buys all her birthday and anniversary cards the first week in January. She, too keeps a calendar and addresses the envelopes in January and always get them out on time.

Bob and I celebrate a monthly anniversary. We had carrot cake as a wedding cake so we buy a large one on the actual Anniversary, cut it into 12 small pieces that we carefully wrap and put in the freezer. Then on the third of each month, we bring it out and have a small celebration.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Anniversaries

My mother-in law, Donna, is really good at them.

Evidence:
Donna keeps a calendar in her kitchen that lists every one's birthday, anniversary, doctor's appointment, and other events/occasions. This is not a small feat. Donna has four grown children, three of whom are married, and five grandchildren from those unions. On top of that since we are a "blended family", she also considers her husband's children and his grandchildren as part of her brood. So that's additionally two grown children, both married, and three more grand kids. If I'm doing my math right - and believe me, I need help - that makes 19 birthdays to remember (20 including my father-in-law's), six wedding anniversaries (including her own) to celebrate, and other events/occasions - the extended family's birthdays and anniversaries for example.

The crazy thing is, she never misses anything. For every occasion we can count on receiving a card and a phone call. That means that she plans/schedules "sending" dates to make sure everyone is honored on the appropriate days! That takes organization and coordination - both talents that I lack. She's a star!

In contrast, I am horrible at them.

Evidence:
I still have not delivered/completed all of my Christmas presents from December. I can barely remember my own wedding anniversary much less someone else's. I have never in my life sent anyone else an anniversary card. If you get a birthday card from me, it is usually late. This year (and I'm ashamed to admit it), I gave my husband an "interactive" Father's Day card. That means I bought it at the last minute and wrote in it as we were on a date. He had gone to get drinks and returned before I had finished composing the message.. Thus, we both wrote in the card. Interactive. In hindsight it was kind of a cool idea but totally and shamefully impromptu.

The good news is Rich (my husband) is as forgetful about important dates as I am. In fact, this year on our wedding anniversary he jokes that "we'll celebrate by being in two different towns." He has to be away for work. It hadn't occurred to me that on our anniversary he'll be away. I hadn't even remembered that our anniversary is in the summer. (sigh)

But it's ok. Specific dates elude us, but everyday feels important to us. Essentially, everyday we celebrate each other. How could an anniversary of any kind or a birthday or holiday be more important than all of the other days we get to be together?

That's what I'm telling myself, at least, until I remember to buy a damn kitchen calendar.

This post was inspired by the Loose Bloggers Consortium, a small and feisty(!) global community. We write weekly on a common topic (Anniversaries, this week) and post responses - all of us together, simultaneously, from all over the world. (Lovely!) Please visit Anu, Ashok, Conrad, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Judy, Magpie 11, Maria and Ramana for other wonderful posts.

4 comments:

Grannymar said...

You have a calendar in your cell phone - that is where I keep my special dates.

Rummuser said...

Welcome to the club Ginger. You have been honest. I too can't remember, nor could Urmeela, except a very few important ones. So, my post explains our attitude to anniversaries.

gaelikaa said...

That's me too. But I'm determined to try to remember in future. My three siblings (who are not on Facebook, btw) forgot to wish me this year and I really felt it. In contrast, all my relatives and friends who wished me knew from FB. In fact, because my husband is so forgetful about these matters, the only birthday celebration I had this year was on FB. And Ramana's blog, as he's my adopted brother and dedicated a blog post to me. If it wasn't for my cyber life, and of course my kids, there wouldn't have been a birthday at all!

Maria said...

I have a friend who is so organized that she buys all her birthday and anniversary cards the first week in January. She, too keeps a calendar and addresses the envelopes in January and always get them out on time.

Bob and I celebrate a monthly anniversary. We had carrot cake as a wedding cake so we buy a large one on the actual Anniversary, cut it into 12 small pieces that we carefully wrap and put in the freezer. Then on the third of each month, we bring it out and have a small celebration.